The grass is always greener on the other side
The grass is always greener on the other side.
This is human nature.
I see it in my friends and I definitely see it in myself.
For me, a lot of this originates from greed. I want the best of both options.
For example, my concerns about risks were addressed and then I was worried about not being able to maximize the benefits.
For example, I was given the opportunity to thrive and then I started to complain about the lack of personal time.
This is just childish and refusing to grow up.
Four steps to address this:
1. Know what is realistic
The world runs on its own rules. And most of time, we have to give up something to get something else.
Know what we want and what we are wiling to give up.
Bear in mind that this might change. The more we know, the more we see, the clearer it will be.
Of course, a little help goes a long way.
2. Make the trade-off decision
Make the decision, knowing clearly this is what I want and this is what I can give up in order to get what I want.
Most of the time, there are no right or wrong trade-offs.
We can pick money or more free time. We can pick reducing risks or maximizing benefits…
It largely depends on our own preferences. But we need to know whatever we pick is our preference and we need to get the expectation clear — We will NOT get the best of both worlds.
3. Stick to it
Stick to your decision and try to make the best of it.
Do not waver at the first sign of frustration. Do not look around. Stay focused.
Many times, we make our decisions right.
4. Never doubt ourselves
Even though many decisions are just preferences and we actually have quite some power to make our decisions right, we will still make wrong decisions for sure, especially looking back when the dust has set.
I have made many wrong decisions, some of which are really costly, setting back my life for many years.
We need to be ok with it and also know that the next opportunity will always come as long as we do not give up.
And being clear on the trade-off and expectations makes it a lot easier.
The last thing we should do is doubt ourselves because that will affect our happiness, confidence, and capability to pursue what we want at the most fundamental level.
It extinguishes the sparks inside us that really makes us us! And it is really hard to re-ignite it!
So if you are doubting yourselves like I am, please stop it and tell yourself — I am who I am and I am on my way to my goals. Not a single bit of my efforts or experiences will be a waste.
To us all!