What is inevitable in life?
Apart from death, pain is probably it.
And the source of most pain for most people is the below two mindset:
- Pain “Should” not happen to me
- Pain can be eliminated and avoided if we try hard
1.Pain “Should” not happen to me
We all would like to think that we are special, privileged and protected.
If that is the case, pain “Should” not happen to me.
Therefore, there are people in pain who look confused and cannot comprehend what is happening.
In those circumstances, the only thing they can do is complain and wait, while in pain.
2.Pain can be eliminated and avoided if we try hard
As the most intelligent being in the known universe, we believe we can change things the way we want to.
Therefore, we can eliminate or avoid pain if we try hard.
This mindset would see people trying to control everything.
They plan ahead, work hard, make compromises out of fear etc etc
They may seem to be doing well, but they do not enjoy life.
And pain comes to them nevertheless.
Stages in life
You may have noticed that these two mindset corresponds well to our first two stages in life.
When people are young, they think they are special and “Should” not experience pain.
When pain happens, they go angry and confused, refuse to face the reality and continue hoping.
Until they get older.
That is when they are convinced that reality is harsh and they are not special or protected.
But the impression of pain in earlier stage of life is so deep that they start to take things into their own hands to avoid that experience again.
So they work hard out of fear of pain.
Clearly, these two stages cannot be the best we as humans can do.
Then what is next?
I think it should be
- Accepting that pain is inevitable in life, but with no fear
- Still loving life, filled with gratitude and kindness
- Working hard to improve life for themselves and people around them
To us all!
